Dany’s dragons CAN be killed, Jaime Lannister couldn’t be dead, and ‘chaos is a ladder.’ 8 things we learnt – or didn’t – from Game Of Thrones
Fans were given the GoT equivalent of ‘Sophie’s Choice’ as a breathtakingly beautiful, brutal, battle saw the writers pit Jaime Lannister and his wry sidekick Bronn against the heroine Daenerys Targaryen and her dragon Drogon.
It meant four of the show’s most popular characters were head-to-head, in do-or-die combat. (Well so it seemed at the time.) It even also had Tyrion Lannister watching on as his new Queen and his brother waged war against each other.
Talking about conflicted…And Tyrion wasn’t much better.
As the four protagonists were moved around like chess pieces, each threatening an adversary or being placed in serious jeopardy of exiting the series, the swings in their fortunes (and our loyalties) became exhausting. It was exhilarating but arguably annoying too.
Ultimately, little was resolved, even in the grand finale.
Jaime Lannister sank inexorably down into the lake but the internet still hummed about whether he had met a watery grave or would somehow live to fight another day.
The weight of his armour should, logically, have made his demise inevitable.
Equally, fans reasoned, a warrior as important as Jaime would surely have died by Drogon rather than by drowning.
In the good old days – the brilliantly clinical bloodletting bad old days of the early series – even our most loved or loathed heroines and villains were killed off regularly.
Here even feeble Theon Greyjoy cheated death for the second week running when Jon Snow held a sword to his throat but didn’t slit it.
Overall ‘The Spoils of War’ was an amazing, epic, piece of television.
But if Jaime, Bronn, Dany, and her beloved beast HAVE all survived, the whole showdown was ultimately rather futile and another disappointing cop-out.
Here are 8 of the main lessons we learnt – or didn’t – from the last episode.
1. Jaime Lannister couldn’t be dead (probably)
Was it really likely that Jaime would narrowly escape certain death from the dragon’s fire only to immediately perish in the lake that he had (conveniently) been pushed into? Having also (miraculously) survived the battle and plunged into the water, Bronn will surely save him.
2. The way Drogon plummeted from the sky proved Dany’s dragons could be killed by Qyburn’s ‘scorpion’ spear-launcher (at least in theory)
The battle of wits (and force) between Bronn and Daenerys was a case of GoT saying ‘read it and weep Dunkirk’
Qyburn’s monster spear-launcher ‘The Scorpion’ knocked Drogon from the sky but the beast pulled up before (crash) landing and mustered a blast at Jaime Lannister suggesting its wounds were not fatal after all. Qyburn could claim a moral victory though.
3. Tyrion is still a Lannister at heart (occasionally)
Tyrion’s place as Daenerys’ chief strategist was on shaky ground. She was not amused to hear that Tyrion had been out-manoeuvred by Cersei and Jamie.
‘I under-estimated our enemies,’ Tyrion conceded.
‘Our enemies ? Your family you mean! Enough of your clever plans!’
We saw where his loyalties really lay when Tyrion saw Dany swooping on her dragon towards the battleground whether Jaime was standing, and muttered: ‘flee you idiot.’ If blood runs thicker than water even for him, their alliance surely cannot last.
4. Daenerys seemed more interested in Jon Snow’s knee than the rest of him (for now)
Things between Jon Snow and Daenerys looked promising when Ser Davos asked him: ‘What do you think of her?’
‘She has a good heart,’ Jon Snow offered.
‘Yes I noticed you staring at her good heart…’ Davos quipped.
On the plus side, she then asked Jon Snow whether he thought she should utilise her dragons. She didn’t care much for his answer though.
There was a definite frisson as he led her into the cavern full of dragonglass.
‘There is something else I want to show you your grace,’ he told her. Yes. We all know what that is, we thought.
Disappointingly it was the ancient cave paintings by The Children Of The Forest depicting their ancestors fighting together against the White Walkers.
She seemed to beam at him as she strode towards him and purred: ‘I will fight for you. I will fight for the North’ before adding the killer blow of ‘when you bend the knee.’
5. Littlefinger was up to something (although neither we nor the Starks have any idea what)
Sansa was immediately alarmed when Bran told her Littlefinger had given him the cut-throat knife made of Valyrian steel once used to try and kill Bran.
‘Why would he give you a dagger? He wouldn’t give you anything unless he wanted something back,’ she mooted.
Whether it was in the hope that Bran would murder Sansa with it, or vice versa, or someone else, was impossible to say.
Bran didn’t want it anyway.
‘I’LL HAVE IT!’ yelled Arya inevitably.
‘I’m not Lord Stark,’ Bran corrected Littlefinger, later telling Arya: ‘I’m not really Bran. Not anymore.’
When Arya had arrived at Winterfell and told the guards ‘I’m Arya Stark’ they refused to take her word for it.
Ser Davos wondered how they should address Jon Stark, observing that ‘King Jon’ didn’t sound right.
‘It doesn’t matter,’ shrugged Snow, still regarding himself mainly as ‘a bastard.’
7. The Starks were a laugh a minute (in between being miserable).
‘Do I have to call you Lady Stark now?’ Arya asked her sister when they were reunited.
‘Yes!’ Sansa commanded dryly before smiling to show she had in fact – and I hope you’re sitting down – been JOKING.
Sansa then asked about her skills as a knife-wielding Ninja: ‘who taught you how to do that?’
‘No–one,’ Arya answered, knowingly referring to her tutor Jaqen’s mantra (‘a man is no one’).
Yes, the Stark sisters were turning into The Chuckle Brothers.
Bran though was way ahead of them, even when it came to comedy.
‘I saw you at the crossroads,’ he told Arya enigmatically.
‘You saw me?’ Arya puzzled, prompting the mumbled response from the boy who last week revealed he was ‘the three-eyed raven’ and could see everything that had ever happened to everyone: ‘I see quite a lot now…’
8. ‘Chaos is a ladder’
It takes something special to make Littlefinger speechless but Bran managed it.
‘I imagine you’ve seen things most men wouldn’t believe,’ Littlefinger suggested.
‘Chaos is a ladder,’ the moody teenager replied simply.