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“We’ll Give You The 1966 World Cup Goal”… German Tabloid Offers Britain 11 bribes To Stay In The EU

German tabloid Bild has offered 11 hilarious bribes in a bid to urge Britain to reject Brexit - even vowing to finally recognise Geoff Hurst's disputed goal in the 1966 World Cup finalGerman tabloid Bild has offered 11 hilarious bribes in a bid to urge Britain to reject Brexit.

In a front page addressed to ‘Dear Brits’, Germany’s most popular paper offers 11 bribes in a bid to convince English voters to reject Brexit.

In one offer, Bild said it would personally reserve sun loungers for Britons on holiday using its own towels. In another concession, the paper said it would finally recognise Geoff Hurst‘s disputed goal in the 1966 World Cup final.

Gesture: Hurst's extra-time strike (pictured) at Wembley which put England 3-2 ahead of the then West Germany has long been a bone of contention between the two countries
Hurst’s extra-time strike (pictured) at Wembley.

 

Hurst’s extra-time strike at Wembley which put England 3-2 ahead of the then West Germany has long been a bone of contention between the two countries.

The paper also offers that if the UK votes Remain, they will stop making jokes about Prince Charles‘s ears and vowed to introduce tea breaks.

In a front page addressed to 'Dear Brits', the paper also offers that if the UK votes Remain, they will stop making jokes about Prince Charle's ears
Prince Charles
Royal approval: In a final goodwill gesture, the newspaper then promised to attend the Queen's 100th birthday
In a final goodwill gesture, the newspaper then promised to attend the Queen’s 100th birthday.

BILD’S BRIBES TO CONVINCE VOTERS TO REJECT BREXIT

  • We’ll acknowledge the Wembley goal
  • We’ll stop making jokes about Prince Charles’s ears
  • We’ll stop using sun cream on the beach out of solidarity with your sunburn
  • We’ll reserve a place with our towels for you on the hotel sun-lounger
  • We’ll introduce tea breaks
  • We’ll turn our clocks back an hour to be in synch with you
  • We’ll do without a goalie in penalty shoot-outs with you to make it a bit more exciting
  • We’ll send (German national football manager) Joachim Low to guard your Crown Jewels
  • We’ll introduce an EU regulation banning a frothy head on beer
  • We’ll all come along to the Queen’s 100th birthday
  • We’ll willingly provide the villain in every Bond film 

MailOnline

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Peace is a wife and mother who reports and analyses global trends from the perspective of a Deeva; in the hope of invoking a thought process that will lead to a positive change.

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